About Therapy
Making an initial connection is essential.
Many people come into therapy with a combination of hope and uncertainty, not sure how or if it works. When we first meet, I’ll make you feel welcome and at ease and invite you to tell me your story.
Initially, your thoughts may feel like a jumble – there is so much to say, the feelings are intense, and it can be challenging to know where to start. I’ll help you through this as I listen, reflect, ask questions, and determine the best way to connect with you.
Therapy is like starting a new relationship – a unique one, indeed, as it is both intimate and professional. You open your inner world to me; I treat that with care and curiosity. I am fully present, interested, and attentive to the subtleties of what you are saying and what you may not be saying. I share my thoughts and observations and help you make connections that deepen your understanding of yourself and the people in your life.
As we continue to discuss your experiences, past and present, you’ll start to see things more clearly. You’ll appreciate the complexity and humanity of yourself and others even more and have more choices about interacting with the world around you.
Trust allows us to probe deeply.
Throughout our work together, you can count on me to engage you with honesty, directness, warmth, and compassion.
A bond of intimacy and trust begins to form, which allows for more profound and challenging work. For example, the safety and security of the therapy relationship make it easier to face the more challenging parts of our personalities head-on: behaviors or ways of being that lead to impasses with other people or get in the way of becoming happy and fulfilled.
The safety of the therapy relationship also allows negative feelings such as disappointment, hurt, or anger to emerge. These often relate to early experiences, which are essential to work through.
For example, maybe I forgot what you said in a prior session; at that moment, I became like your neglectful or overly distracted mother. Understanding what is happening between us and what we might be re-enacting from the past is very powerful and transformative in therapy. It also leads to insights into experiences in your other relationships.
Significant change will occur.
As we successfully work through these therapeutic experiences, you will feel deeply known, accepted, and understood. You will feel stronger and more secure in yourself.
Greater self-awareness and self-acceptance make communicating easier when you feel vulnerable, and your relationships improve.
You can enjoy more closeness and openness with friends and loved ones and more self-assurance in work relationships.
About Heidi Kling, PhD
Why I love being a therapist.
I started, like many college students, being pre-med. Like many, I was weeded out in organic chemistry. Though it did not seem practical then, I surrendered to my love of stories and people and switched my major to English Literature.
Little did I know that this fascination with characters and how their inner worlds and external circumstances combine to set events in motion in their lives would be enormously valuable when I later became a psychologist.
Since childhood, I have disappeared into stories and fully immersed myself in the characters’ lives. They were real people and alive for me, and I cared about what happened to them. This passion for and investment in people, with all their complexities and flaws, has always been with me. I feel so fortunate to have found a profession that allows me to bring this heart and passion into my daily work.
My desire to work with people to overcome their struggles also comes from my experiences. I had a difficult childhood and had to fight through adversity, but I was always determined to get through it and create a better life for myself, even if I didn’t always know how that would look.
Learning to overcome obstacles is a cornerstone.
My curiosity about life, sense of humor, and ability to connect with people helped me along my path, as did knowing when it was time to get help to work through some of the issues rooted in my past.
Over time, I realized I had cultivated resilience and optimism and that these qualities had become embedded in my approach to life; I encourage this in my work as well – whether to help people see that they have these qualities or to help them develop them.
From personal experience, I know that you can overcome any challenge with determination, support, and good decisions. My confidence in this informs my work as I encourage you to explore what’s happening in your life, where it stems from, and how to change it.
Psychotherapy offers a chance for change.
Psychotherapy isn’t simply about overcoming obstacles and moving forward; it’s about understanding that to do this, you sometimes need to go to painful places or face uncomfortable realities head-on.
Doing the work of psychotherapy allows you to take charge of your life rather than spend it avoiding or defending against things you’d rather not know or think about.
This takes hope and courage and isn’t easy. I am here to help you with that part, too.
Broad training benefits my work with clients.
I have been a clinical psychologist for 30 years. I have had the privilege of working with all kinds of people and watching them change and improve.
I have also had the good fortune to receive excellent clinical training at The Derner Institute for Advanced Psychological Studies at Adelphi University in New York, where I received my PhD; further training in psychoanalytic psychotherapy at The Village Institute and the NYU Postdoctoral Program in Psychotherapy and Psychoanalysis; the Program for Managing Eating Disorders at Gracie Square Hospital In New York City; and continuous mentoring from some of the best clinicians in my field.
My training and experience are invaluable in my work, and I believe you will benefit from that. But my approach to my work might impact you more immediately. I have a warm and interactive style and am attuned, responsive, and practical as we talk about your life and history and how they connect.
I am also deeply committed to helping you change and grow so that you can have a fulfilling, happy, and meaningful life.
When I’m not working…
I’ve been learning to enjoy being an empty nester, with quiet mornings, relaxing evenings (and being an attentive mother to my two sweet cats).
I also love reading, running through different Brooklyn neighborhoods, and having good dinners with friends.